Yes, it is that time of the year... time to look back at the past year, evaluate the clutter and make some changes. For many of us, that means going through the closets and tossing last year's fashions or items that do not fit. For others it means organizing and fixing tools and gardening equipment in the garage. For me, it means all of that... and a little more.
I like to look at Spring Cleaning as a way to really take care of things, to do the nitty gritty "toothbrush in the grout" work on my entire life. Yes, I go through my closets, I wash the walls and dust above the window sills. Heck, I even go into the basement and vacuum the rafters. (Let em tell you, that is no small feat for a person like me!) I truly enjoy the yearly ritual of kicking the cobwebs aside and taking the time to not only evaluate what I still need, what I still want, what I value, and what think needs changing but to take action on my decisions.
One of the things I enjoy most about Spring Cleaning is the work I do around my relationships. I review the past year and take a look at the people I feel closest to. Are they the same people I felt closest to the year before? Why have some of the names on my list changed? Of the people that I have become closer to, what drew me to them, where did I meet them and where do I see the relationship going? Of those that I may have lost touch with, what happened? Of those I still spend time with, how do I feel about those relationships? I especially evaluate my own behaviors and actions in each friendship. Where am I needing to make changes or amends?
I am always surprised at what I find out about myself through this process. Often, my relationships don't change much through the year. When this is the case I don't say "Right on, keep it up!". Nor do I feel the need to rock the boat and wreak havoc on my relationships just to add an element of excitement. If there is a lot of change I react the same way - not berating myself; but also not congratulating myself on "gettin' rid of the weeds" in my garden of friends. In both cases I simply take a really close look at each of my friendships, especially my part in them. I try to recall how much I have been praying for my friends. I usually have to (gulp) admit that I have been lacking in that aspect. Do I have unrealistic expectations? Do I need my friends to do things for me that I have been unwilling to do for them? Do I support them? Do I look for what they can do for me or do I look for what I can do for them? I usually have a pretty high opinion of myself and my ability to be a good friend... until I start this deliberate process. I get a big dose of reality pretty darn quick.
I think about what changes I would like to see in my life and how that might be reflected in my relationships. What do I want to see happen in the next year or so? Who would enjoy being a part of that? How can I include my circle of friends in ways that they would not only enjoy, but benefit from? I have learned that people who care about you WANT to be included- they feel valued and appreciated when you ask them to be a part of your hopes, goals and dreams. They are usually your biggest cheerleaders!
Once I have finished doing all of this work, I get to do the fun part - telling my close friends and loved ones how I feel. I honestly have to say that sending a card is my favorite way to do that. Even before I started GimmeGrace I would spend time every Spring hand writing heartfelt notes to people in my life. I make sure that each Christian card is personal and uplifting - fun and easy to do - it really makes my friends feel good! Spring is the perfect time to send Christian cards as their receipt is so unexpected. So go for it! Clean out your closet, clean up your life and make a clean start to more meaningful friendships!
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