Like many Americans, I have been thinking a lot about gratitude and Thanksgiving lately. I figured I should get a post in before the holiday... just managed to squeeze it in before it was too late!
According to Wikipedia, Thanksgiving Day is a harvest festival celebrated primarily in the United States and Canada. Traditionally, Thanksgiving is associated with giving thanks to God for the harvest and expressing gratitude. While historically religious in origin, Thanksgiving is now primarily identified as a secular holiday.
I am glad that the entire nation is given the opportunity to reflect on the good things in life with a few days off, I believe that it is important to intentionally be grateful and give thanks. Often we can get caught up in our issues, anxieties and concerns and do not take the time to review what is going well, to look at what gives us hope or make us happy. It may be naive of me, but I think that there are things in every person's life at any given moment that they can be thankful for. Based on my own experience of walking through some very very dark times, I can say that this is true for me. I have noticed as my faith and trust in God has increased is that I am able to see the good things in life much more clearly. I have to admit, I have no idea how I managed to make it through life without Jesus! I was a mess with no vision of hope or salvation. (Granted, it was there, I just couldn't see it through the dark lenses I was viewing my life through)
Right now I am grateful for the following things:
Jesus
God
my salvation
my faith
the fact that God has a plan for me, that he loves me, keeps me safe and I have value in his eyes
my husband who loves me and is willing to grow and learn with me
my church
my dogs
my cat
my wonderful and supportive friends who love me no matter how much I cry on them
my health
my bike
my snowshoes
my xc skis
my waders and fishing rod
my ability to use the equipment above
my ability to forgive and the fact that I do not hold grudges
my Steven Ministry class and the Steven Ministry program at my church
Nancy Ferguson and Fresh Start Jail Ministry
Alcoholics Anonymous, my sobriety and that I have lived to see the end of 2009
my home
my creative abilities
The first five are key to my happiness. I do not need to know everything and I do not need to be in control of life. I just need to have a little bit of faith as that small amount will open the door for much much more. Jesus helps me in my lack of faith; he reminds me that God has my back, that God knows what is best for me and is in complete control.
Blessings to you and all of yours this wonderful Thanksgiving Season!
As it is Thanksgiving, I thought I would comment on gratitude and thankfulness however I am realizing I need to finish my thoughts on my last post, it just can't wait until next week. Last Thursday I shared Jesus' teaching story about the business owner who left the country and gave three of his employees responsibility over a portion of his finances. If you remember, two of the people took the funds and worked to increase the money. The third person was afraid of the business owner and hid the money they had been given. The business owner was incredibly disappointed and upset with this employee. In fact, the owner said 'That's a terrible way to live! It's criminal to live cautiously like that! If you knew I was after the best, why did you do less than the least? The least you could have done would have been to invest the sum with the bankers, where at least I would have gotten a little interest...... get rid of this "play-it-safe" who won't go out on a limb. Throw him out into utter darkness.
I have realized that I am that third employee. God may not have given me money, but he did give me the gift of creative talent. He put me on this earth to share my creativity with the world in a way that will bring others closer to him. This was why I started GimmeGrace; to share my creative talents, to encourage others to look at Christianity in a new way, to spread the peace, excitement and joy that a relationship with Christ can bring to a person's life.
Well I am stuck right now. I have created the company, produced the cards, built the website and set up systems that will help GimmeGrace be successful. However, the one thing that I am (and always have been) terrified of doing is selling. I was disappointed to find that people do not generally buy greeting cards online. Nothing I do can really change that. What this means is that I get to personally go out and share my cards with stationary vendors, churches and bookstores. I try to look at it as an opportunity to SHARE, but I have to admit, I would really rather hide everything under a rock and wait for someone else to do it. I have done the mental exercise of asking myself, "What is the worst thing that could happen?" Well, I will honestly tell you - the worst thing that could happen is that I would throw up! My stomach gets itself completely tied up in knots when I even THINK of approaching someone to discuss sales.
It is funny, as I mentioned earlier this month, my greatest Spiritual Gift has been the gift of Faith. So, here is my question: If my faith is that large, why do I doubt God's care and concern for me? Why do I question his ability to direct me around my trials safely, his ability to see me through my fears to bigger and better things? I can only imagine it is because I am human - which is kind of hard to change - and it is my nature to be fearful, doubtful and self centered. I know I need help; help from God, help from Jesus and help from you. I need to be accountable to you and to those I am in fellowship with. I am going to start out small, but firmly believe that a small start will lead to something bigger.
So here we go..... this is my promise to God, Jesus, myself and you:
I will make 10 sales calls each week for the next two weeks. I will let you know what the results are on December 9th. Can you pray for me? A prayer that I do not throw up on any potential clients would be nice.
I hope that you find some solace in hearing that you are not alone in your struggles with being human. I am right there next to you, working through my weaknesses and shortcomings. I know that I am not the only one who has these issues; we ALL do, every one of us! God meant us to be in community so that we can support one another and bear one another's burdens. To honor God's call to do this, I am being as transparent as I can. Please, feel free to let me know how I can help you let your talents shine! I would love to help where I can.
So I have really gone crazy with the Spiritual Gifting, haven't I? I guess that is because I am really challenged and nervous about what God has blessed me with. It makes me think about the Parable of the Talents. (Back in Jesus' time, a talent was a unit of money) It is a story Jesus told in the bible book of Matthew, chapter 25 verses 14-30. For those of you not familiar with it, here it is in the bible translation known as "The Message".
The Story About Investment
14-18 "It's also like a man going off on an extended trip. He called his servants together and delegated responsibilities. To one he gave five thousand dollars, to another two thousand, to a third one thousand, depending on their abilities. Then he left. Right off, the first servant went to work and doubled his master's investment. The second did the same. But the man with the single thousand dug a hole and carefully buried his master's money.
19-21 "After a long absence, the master of those three servants came back and settled up with them. The one given five thousand dollars showed him how he had doubled his investment. His master commended him: 'Good work! You did your job well. From now on be my partner.'
22-23 "The servant with the two thousand showed how he also had doubled his master's investment. His master commended him: 'Good work! You did your job well. From now on be my partner.'
24-25 "The servant given one thousand said, 'Master, I know you have high standards and hate careless ways, that you demand the best and make no allowances for error. I was afraid I might disappoint you, so I found a good hiding place and secured your money. Here it is, safe and sound down to the last cent.'
26-27 "The master was furious. 'That's a terrible way to live! It's criminal to live cautiously like that! If you knew I was after the best, why did you do less than the least? The least you could have done would have been to invest the sum with the bankers, where at least I would have gotten a little interest.
28-30 "'Take the thousand and give it to the one who risked the most. And get rid of this "play-it-safe" who won't go out on a limb. Throw him out into utter darkness.'
Honestly, that is all I am going to say for today. Think about it. How does this story challenge you to use your gifts? I have to admit it hits incredibly close to home for me. Actually, it scares the heck out of me. I know what God has put me on this earth to do and I am still frozen with fear. I am having a tough time going out and doing the things he has commissioned me to do. I have faith that all will be well and work out for the good of him AND me, but something seems to be holding me back. I would appreciate prayer, if you happen to need someone to pray for. Thanks and blessings!
So what do all of these blog posts about me and my struggles have to do with anyone else? How does my path to discovering my spiritual gifts relate to what you might be going through? I suppose I am looking to encourage you to turn to God, maybe take the S.H.A.P.E. survey and see if the gifts brought to light there are what you expected them to be. In fact, you can click here and check it out for yourself. Here is another online survey that is a little different. Either one works. (Keep in mind that any survey cannot fully explain the spiritual gifts God has given a person. Look at this survey as a starting point, a way to see things in a new light.)
This experience opened up a whole new way of looking at things for me and I want to share that with you. I want you to know that you are not alone in your insecurity, doubt and brokenness. God has a plan for you and he has equipped you with special talents and passions meant to help you fulfill that plan.
Take some time to pray before starting the survey. Ask that you be open and willing to see and hear what is revealed to you. Once you are finished, look at the results with excitement as opposed to anxiety or fear. Think of it as an opportunity to unwrap a present... expect to be surprised! Maybe you thought you were a leader but found your highest score to be in mission work. This doesn't mean that you aren't a good leader, it means that you have a new ability and passion that you were not aware of. Think about how God is challenging you with the gifts that you were not aware of. How might you use those gifts in your church, your relationships and your community? Look through your bible to see what God has to say about each of the gifts you have been blessed with. The second link I supplied above has links to the definitions of many of the various gifts God gives. Read through yours and see how you feel about it. Do you get excited? A little nervous? I tend to think that is a good way to feel, God is challenging you to stretch outside of your comfort zone.
I believe God is always trying to get us to depend on him more, to lean in closer to him and really count on him for everything. In our discovering that God has given us new spiritual gifts, we are becoming more in tune with what HE has in store for us. He gives us new gifts as we become more able to handle them. Fortunately (or unfortunately :=) we never stop growing and learning. God continually gives us more responsibility as we can handle it. He is looking to challenge us so that we can lead a life full of the holy spirit, a life that glorifies him and brings him joy, a life that draws others closer to him. Try committing to pray about your gifting every day for a week. I bet God will have some pretty amazing things to say to you!
When I took the S.H.A.P.E. spiritual gifting survey last week I was unprepared for how it would challenge me. I was all ready to see the survey reflect what I "already knew" to be true about myself and was shocked to find what I considered to be my strengths listed below traits I felt weak in. I may enjoy teaching and encouraging people, but my biggest strength just might be my faith in the Lord, followed by closely by mercy for others. I suppose that is what happens when you think you know yourself better than God knows you... actually I feel a sense of relief knowing that God knows me better than I know myself. It allows me to give up a little more my desire to understand everything about myself, the desire to be in control of everything.
Let me start by saying a simple 7 page survey cannot begin to touch on the spiritual gifts God has given a person. I look at this survey as a starting point, a way to see things in a new light. I am not discouraged by the results I saw, I am intrigued and excited. If what I thought was true about myself might not actually be the case, what next? What is in store for me? What does God have in mind?
I have come to see that my focus on teaching and encouragement left me sitting smack in the middle of my past. Those used to be by my core strengths and I still excel at both, however I have been blessed with new gifts as I have grown in my relationship with the Lord. In the past I used to believe that God had good things in store for everyone else, but not for me; I saw myself as unworthy and lacking in value. I found solace in encouraging others as the relief they found through their interactions with me gave me a small sense of purpose. What little value I believed I had often came from my ability to help others discover their creative talents. Looking back I can see how sad this was. God wanted more for me, a whole lot more.
As I have walked side by side with God through a number of trials I have come to realize how faithful he is. The results of my struggles have never been what I hoped for or wanted, they have always been much, much better. This has helped me see that his plan for me is bigger and way more robust than I could ever imagine. As he is continually faithful to me, my faith in him has grown.
So now that I have this faith, what am I supposed to do with it? Well, already faith has given me the ability to step out and do things that used to terrify me. (like getting out of bed, for example... (yes, seriously!)) It is a continual effort - to overcome my fears and fully trust the Lord - but one that gets progressively easier. This wonderful gift of faith enhances all the others that God has blessed me with. It helps me continually return to him for love and support as opposed to looking inward or to other people for peace of mind and well being. It allows me to stretch further outside of my comfort zone in order to do what God has given me to do as I know I am safe and loved fully by him and that he will not let me fail.
But how does God want me to use my faith to follow him more closely and what does any of this this have to do with anyone else? Check back in a few and I'll fill you in on what I believe God has in mind!
I just took a spiritual gifting survey my church gave out a few weeks ago. It was the S.H.A.P.E. inventory; some of you might be familiar with it. No single survey taken in an hour or two can fully represent what God has given us, but this one does a pretty good job. It takes into consideration much more than just our skills. In fact, S.H.A.P.E. stands for Spiritual Gifts, Heart, Abilities, Personality and Experience; all the things that are accounted for in the survey. I was really surprised by the results I got. I have always thought of myself as an encourager and a teacher, I love watching people grow in their abilities and confidence in themselves. Because of this I was amazed to see both of those gifts show up at the bottom of my list. Also, the gift of faith (which I had thought of as something I was not blessed with) was at the very top!
This really got me thinking. What was God setting me up to do? What is his purpose for me? How was my evaluation of myself getting in the way of what he has in store for me? If faith is my biggest gift, why am I so afraid to step out and do what I know God is calling me to do? I looked up a well known verse on spiritual gifts, one found in the Apostle Paul's letter to the Romans, chapter 12 verse 3-8.
Paul says, "I realize how kind God has been to me, and so I tell each of you not to think you are better than you really are. Use good sense and measure yourself by the amount of faith that God has given you. A body is made up of many parts, and each of them has its own use. That's how it is with us. There are many of us, but we each are part of the body of Christ, as well as part of one another."
He continues, "God has also given each of us different gifts to use. If we can prophesy, we should do it according to the amount of faith we have. If we can serve others, we should serve. If we can teach, we should teach. If we can encourage others, we should encourage them. If we can give, we should be generous. If we are leaders, we should do our best. If we are good to others, we should do it cheerfully."
The first few lines caused me to pause. My insecurities have kept me thinking that others are much more valuable than I am. Because of this, I have come to realize that I consider myself as being much better than others at being worse! If I focus on my faith, there is no room for self doubt and pity. If God loves me and has given me special gifts and talents, maybe I should take the time to consider that... Paul comments that we are all part of the body of Christ, we all have need for him and need for one another. Those around me, the church and God depend on me to do what I was built to do. It is my duty to recognize that and step out in faith, to trust in God that I am loved and valued, that I can do what he has given me to do.
So what does this mean? Right now it means I get to pray more and talk less.... Check out next week's first post. I'll fill you in on what God tells me!
I love sending birthday cards and I usually try to include some kind of bible verse for the birthday cards I write, but I have to admit, it isn't always easy to find a good verse for a birthday card. So what is a hip, fun loving, kinda wacky Christian girl to do?
I usually start with a good prayer that includes a lot of gratitude and thanks for both God and the person I am sending the card to. I have discovered that gratitude and humility get me right in line with what God wants for me and often opens up new ways of thinking and feeling about the person I am writing to. (I especially do this when I am sending a card to someone I am not particularly happy with, like a family member I am disappointed with or a boss that might not be on my current list of favorite people.) Afterward, I write down some thoughts and feelings about the person that came up while in prayer. Anything goes - believe me, the more you write here, the more verses for birthday cards will come up for you!
As an example, my mother in law has a birthday in June; right on the summer solstice. A few weeks before I will grab a few of my cards and spend some time thinking of her as I look through the selection I have, then I get down to prayer. Among other things, I thank God for his presence in my life and the work he has done to better me and the relationships I have. I thank him for the gift of life my mother in law gave her son, who is now my husband. I thank him for the relationship I have forged with "mom two" and for the joy and exuberance she has for living life. Then I spend some time writing about "mom two": words that come to mind are bright, joyful, happy, energetic, ascendant, passionate, loving, active, avid, athletic, colorful, excited. I don't stop there, I try to come up with at least 25 things that describe the recipient of the card I am sending. I try to cover both the good and not so good thoughts as I might be able to find some encouraging or meaningful verses. (Remember, this list is for your eyes only) This may seem like a lot of work for one card, but you can save these lists and use them again and again for any occasion for correspondence; plus, they make great prayer reminders.
Now comes the fun part! (I thank God for computers and the internet every day.) To find verses for birthday cards, go to an online bible reference. I like www.BibleGateway.com. Type in one or two of your descriptive words and see what comes up. Don't worry if specific verses don't come up, you can also use the topic index or results from other sites referenced on the results. I typed in "joyful" and "energetic" for my mother in law. There were no verses that contained both of those words, however the topical index gave the following results: 1. HEART » RENEWED » Be joyful (1 Samuel 2:1; Psalms 4:7;97:11; Isaiah 65:14; Zechariah 10:7) When I clicked on that link, I found a perfect verse for birthday cards, especially when in the Contemporary English translation of the bible:
Psalm 4:7
You brought me more happiness than a rich harvest of grain and grapes.
I believe the best part of looking for verses for birthday cards is the time you get to spend in prayer with God, being truly grateful and thankful for him and the people he has placed in your life. This process has changed my relationships greatly, they are much more Christ centered; free of resentments and jealousy. I know that approaching the search for verses for birthday cards this way will bless you in ways you never imagined... prayer always does that!
Good luck and have fun finding verses for birthday cards!
When I head down to my mailbox I have to admit – there is never a bounce in my step. I just don’t get excited about what’s waiting for me there. I can always count on the usual suspect; catalogs, coupon books, banking statements and, of course, bills… none of those things inspire me or get my heart pumping. In fact I often feel as though I am a bar code, a number that represents my membership in a particular consumer base. I am just one more individual ripe for a credit card application, advertisement, or sale announcement. I rarely feel as though I am recognized as an actual person!
One day a few years ago I trudged down to my mailbox with the usual enthusiasm. I remember grabbing the handle rather violently – I was expecting a large bill from an insurance company and was quite nervous about it. As I walked back to my house I thumbed through the wad of mail in my hands; the large number of obscure catalogs and marketing magazines really made it difficult to maintain my grip!
I was surprised to see a cancelled stamp hiding behind a brochure for a well-known cosmetic company. It really got my attention. It was stuck to a colorful envelope, thankfully not the kind of envelope that would hold anything looking for a payment. My name was hand written on the front and the return address was one I recognized as being that of an old friend from church. At that point, my day changed - I didn’t even have to open the Christian card, I knew something good was in store for me. What I found inside was a short, heartfelt note letting me know that she and her family had been thinking of me. All the stress of finances, incoming bills and daily responsibilities disappeared. I was blessed with the knowledge that someone had thought of me and spent the time to let me know by sending me a beautiful Christian card.
It wasn’t my birthday. It wasn’t Christmas. It wasn’t a graduation or baptism. My friend simply wanted me to know that she loved me and I was close to her heart. The Christian card she sent me not only calmed my nerves, but it also reconnected me with my faith and the love that God has for me. It truly made a huge impact.
So, do you want to make a difference? Send a card… Better yet, send a Christian card! It will make more of an impression than you would expect.
I debated whether or not to post entry, I felt sharing my story of starting my business might be a bit to personal. I also believed my story did not have enough strife to make it interesting and I felt too inexperienced to discuss starting a business. After much thought, I realized publishing my story wasn’t about being interesting or an expert. It was about seeing beyond my acute fear that what I had to say wasn’t good enough or important enough to make a difference. This fear is my adversary and I work to overcome it every day.
Two years ago I had an idea: create a line of edgy Christian greeting cards that would give people a new way of seeing and sharing their faith; cards whose funky, modern designs would attract the attention of many who have regarded Christianity (or at least its social expression) with suspicion; cards that would be a ministry of healing and connection. Sure, this big idea was mine, however I had no clue where it came from. I was a trained designer, but incapable of doing anything more than showing up and completing mindless tasks; too fearful and insecure to ask for more satisfying and challenging work. The idea scared me so much I tried to shut down any dreams of its success. Despite my efforts, I couldn’t make the idea go away and I couldn’t ignore it. Looking for guidance, I met with my pastor. Fearful of his opinions I spoke with uncertainty, laughing at the idea and myself. He looked at me and asked, “Why are you doing this when its obvious you don’t want to?” I was taken aback, unprepared for a question like that. Eventually the words came: “I’m tired of being afraid. God willing, I will regain my passion for design, find confidence in my abilities and become excellent at what I do. I will be able to shoulder the responsibility of entrepreneurship and lose my fear of failure.” I was shocked to hear my answer. Those powerful words didn’t seem to come from me, but I somehow knew they were true. This marked a significant shift in my self-perception. Although I didn’t believe I could achieve any of this on my own, the concept that God would help me began to form. This is when things started to change.
The idea has since come alive. Aptly named GimmeGrace, we are on the verge of big things. Already our cards inspire and encourage people from all walks of life. Personally I’m not perfect, but I am passionate, often fearless and good at what I do. I walk in confidence, gratitude and joy and feel most alive helping others do the same.
Advice for October: Do something you are afraid of every day. This may sound trite, but making a habit of regularly facing fear gradually loosens the grip it has on us. Once one looks back on a time of intentional fear facing, the idea that life may not be so terrifying often begins to form. This makes bigger challenges less intimidating and allows for increased confidence and clarity. Personally, practicing courage hasn’t solved every problem, but it has turned many insurmountable anxieties into bumps in the road.
I have been attending a new church for the past few months. I have to admit I feel a little guilty, like I am being unfaithful and cheating on the church I currently belong to. Don't get me wrong, I love my old church: the congregation is large and diverse, the pastor is humorous and full of incredible wisdom, the ministries are supportive and loving... so why am I thinking of making a move?
I believe that God has a plan for me and change is a part of it. Although it is expected and often good, I have always found change to be uncomfortable - so I avoid it. God is challenging my complacency by leading me to this new place of worship. He is giving me exciting things to think about, opportunities for growth in faith and reliance in him.
The fact that God is in control and has a specific path for me becomes more and more apparent as I go through the process of deciding where to worship. Guilt, doubt and insecurity continually pop up. I have become consumed with self-centered questions: "Did I do enough for my church? Will they be mad at me if I leave? How will they be able to continue the level of care without me? Will they forget me?" and especially "Will they still like me?"
I have come to realize that it is not all about me. If what I am doing aligns with where God is leading me, I can't go wrong. The church will do just fine without me - the congregation is large and diverse, someone else will step in and do the work that I have been doing. I have used my God given gifts to further his message in ways that are unique to my abilities. I have done my best to be the salt and the light, to uplift those in need and support the church's vision and mission. God loves me, values me and appreciates the work I have done. Now he has something new in mind and I get to discover what it is. Get over yourself, Coventry! Get ready for something big. Now that you are finally out of the way, God can really get to work.
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